My Koran

I have been looking all over the house for my copy of the Koran, so I could burn it in solidarity on Saturday with Rev Jones in Florida. I was going to put slices of bacon between the pages, to make it burn better, and encourage it with some old lawnmower gas. Waste of good bacon, though. Trouble is, I have only one, and after I burned it I would have nothing for reference when some Islamist moron quotes it. I am certainly not going to pay Moslems money to buy another one! Do they give them away free someplace, like the Gideons give away Bibles? I would just as soon burn a Bible except that Christians don't give a shit; they have more sense.

Maybe I will just eat a ham sandwich and smudge the pages of the Koran as I munch; seems kind of lame, somehow.